Public Speaking for Awkward Ambiverts

Awkward ambivert = really awful public speaker.

I am so awkward. And also an ambivert.

An ambivert is a person who draws energy from small groups where they feel comfortable. (As opposed to an extravert for whom the more people the better, and an introvert for whom being alone is the happy place.)

Awkward ambivert = really awful public speaker.

In my head, I’m good. I know what I want to say. I’m put together. I’m smart and smooth and friendly and awesome. I’m great with writing, where I can read and revise and fix things.

And you know, not come across as a maniac.

I’m good in a small-group setting, too. Especially if I know everyone and I know my role and I feel like I belong. (This is starting to feel like it must apply to everyone, right? But there are people who absolutely Thrive in the spotlight.)

When I open my mouth in front of a large group of people who are all staring at me, I stumble. I get this weird giggly-thing going on under my voice. I have a tendency to think faster than I speak and I lose my train of thought and get stuck, like a deer in headlights. I also lose my breath.

If I’m on video and I have to look at myself while I’m talking the awkward is magnified by about a thousand. All of my personal insecurities bubble up and my tendency to think faster than I speak is stopped dead in it’s tracks by my tendency to worry about my double chin or how weird my hair looks.

Decide whether you’re just going to show up anyway, or stay home.

When you combine awkward with being an ambivert that tends toward introversion — boy, it would be so easy to stay home. I’ve done that. Lots. Way more than I’m happy with.

I’ve never started a podcast. I say it’s because the tech is beyond me, but the truth is that I haven’t been able to move past my fear of sounding ridiculous.

And even though every mentor I’ve had has said that I should be making videos for Ninja Writers, I don’t. I can be pretty convincing when I say that writers don’t…

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